Even in the best of times, the holiday season can bring mixed emotions. Our holiday memories might be a mixed bag of both positive and negative experiences. Often we grieve for our loved ones who are no longer with us to celebrate. This year the pandemic has already caused us all so many losses, big and small, and it will no doubt impact our holiday celebrations. While we will hopefully find some happiness and joy this holiday season, we still might feel a sense of loss for our family traditions or sadness that we can’t be with those we love.

The coexistence of joy and sorrow seems to be part of the human experience. According to a Czech proverb, “joy and sorrow sleep in the same bed.” I really appreciate that image; joy and sorrow sleeping in the same bed conveys a sense of comfort and familiarity with one another. Perhaps they complement each other well, like a longtime couple.

I recently discovered a poem that captures these feelings. I find it helpful to read this through slowly several times, and I like to pay attention to what words or phrases most capture my attention:

Holding Joy and Sorrow in the Same Hand: A Poem of Acceptance
by Beth Bruno

Holding joy and sorrow
in the same hand
I rest.
Ceasing my attempts to extinguish the sorrow
I wait.

There is wisdom in both
joy and sorrow.

One cannot exist without the other.

Sorrow tempers joy,
bringing
sweetness
tenderness
refinement.

Joy leavens sorrow,
bringing
air
space
lightness.

Opening my hand to peer in,
I see what it means to be
human.

My compassion is awakened.

I reach out my hand,
filled with
joy
and
sorrow,
to a world hungry for
compassion.

I offer what I have,
bringing
empathy
tenderness
grace,
to a world also holding
joy and sorrow
in the same hand.

May you rest in the assurance that it’s OK to carry all of the emotions you may be carrying this holiday season. And may our compassion for one another be awakened as we realize we are all holding both joy and sorrow in our hands.

Blessings & peace to you,
Jennifer, CPE Intern