Beauty and Frailty

I came across this quote and it halted me, “The beauty and the frailty of life are not opposing qualities. It’s precisely in the frailty, and our response, that the beauty is uncovered.” – Kerr

I suppose it’s because this year, 2020, has left me feeling soul weary. I suppose it’s because I have been swimming in a sea of unknowns, fears, loneliness, and loss. And because everyone else it too, everyone is working hard to keep each other buoyant. But the waters are thick and cling to our limbs and every single move takes more energy than it’s supposed to. Weariness is multiplied by weariness and we long for light.

This year has been the opposite of whatever walking on the moon must feel like where astronauts float a little between each step. There is no floating. Instead, gravity keeps us heavy and all of our exertion brings us up close to our own frailty. We have limitations; we cannot do it all – all of the time – with no end in sight.  

Soon this year will end. The new one will arrive. We will wake up in the morning on New Year’s Day still needing to grab a mask before we stop in the store to pick up some milk. The waters may still feel thick and clingy. We may still feel tired.

But if I revisit the quote that captured me, “The beauty and the frailty of life are not opposing qualities. It’s precisely in the frailty, and our response, that the beauty is uncovered,” I can find hope. Maybe it’s not in spite of this difficult year, but because of it, that I will connect with the beauty of my own soul, marvel at the beauty of the souls around me, who in the murkiest of thick waters remain aware of other souls struggling to stay afloat. Maybe feeling weary and peering at my own frailty is the crucible in which deep and profound beauty waits. It awaits our response while we sit weary and soul tired before it emerges and fills us with strength.

Here lies the hope, here is what captured my longing soul. When we come to the end of ourselves and sit depleted it is within our ability to respond in a way that allows the beauty around us and within us to strength and sustain us. As we shift our gaze from murky waters to sunshine’s warmth, from struggle to love, beauty will greet us and sustain us with hope.

– Cherie Shaw, CPE Intern